At every moment we have the choice of either feeling gratitude for what has been given to us or indulging in grievance about what is missing. Grievance and gratitude are polar opposites. Grievance focuses on what is not there – the imperfections of relational love – and looks for someone to blame. Gratitude recognises what is here – the simple beauty of human presence and contact – and responds to it with appreciation

John Welwood, Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships.

photo from  Saint Roch Cemetery, New Orleans