To live each day as if it were your last, you would be trying to remedy all the mistakes you had made,
If you live each day as if it were your first, you are freed from all obligations, all guilt, all the regrets, all the things unsaid.
Katrina Repka & Alan Finger Breathing Space for the Modern Woman
British Psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott wrote about the importance of a holding environment for the person when she or he is an infant. This is the psychical and physical space where the infant is protected without knowing he or she is protected. This creates a sense of stability and safety. At that early age the relationship between the infant and its environment (caregiver) is the primary and most important reality. Within the context of this relationship, Winnicott spoke of potential space which serves as a bridge between interior experience and external reality. The function of this space is to be a bridge between the multi faceted realm of interior, or unconscious, experience and the time-and space-bound realm of external, or conscious, experience.
Some studies of the effects of meditation are focusing on its effects on those parts of the brain which are laid down in those crucial early attachment experiences between the child and the caregiver. It may be that sitting in silence revisits and nourishes neural patterns related to a sense of stability and attunement.
“Sitting in meditation is essentially simplifying space. Our daily lives are in constant movement: lots of things going on, lots of people talking, lots of events taking place. In the middle of that, it’s very difficult to sense what we are in our life.
When we simplify the situation, when we take away the externals and remove ourselves from the ringing phone, the television,the people who visit us, the dog who needs a walk, we get a chance to face ourselves…”
Charlotte Joko Beck
“Each day we can take the time to quietly hold others in our hearts and wish them well. Any particular day it might include someone who has been helpful or inspiring to us, someone we know who is ill or feeling alone or afraid, someone who is experiencing triumph and joy, or someone we are about to meet with some trepidation. Taking just 10 minutes a day to reflect in this way is a powerful path to transformation”
Sharon Salzberg
Traditionally, in the Christian yearly calendar, November is the month for remembering those who have died.The roots of this tradition are probably found in the basic human awareness of the approach of winter and the shortening of the days. As well as reminding us of the impermanence of all things, including our health and life, it helps us reflect on the other losses which we face at times in our lives, such as when faced with change, or sickness or having to move. The most basic practice in these moments is to be aware of the feelings these losses provoke and not to run from them.
“On some basic yet very deep level all of us feel fundamentally alone, and until we face this directly, we will fear it. Most of us will do almost anything to avoid this fear. Many, when faced with the fear of aloneness, get extra busy, or try to find some other escape. Ultimately, however, the willingness to truly feel the fear of aloneness and loss is the only way to transcend it. It’s also the only way to develop intimacy with others, because genuine intimacy can’t be based on neediness or on the fear of being alone.”
Ezra Bayda
Today, Sunday, is a Day of Rest. There is a lot of wisdom in the religious traditions which set aside times and rhythms of rest. The Bible tells us that God rested on the seventh day, and even allowing for the anthropomorphic nature of the description, we can see that this contains a deep truth. It is clear that God did not rest because of tiredness, but to show that a rhythm of work and pausing is somehow deeply related to our holiness and our wholeness. The Hebrew word for “rested” can sometimes also mean to touch ones soul, drop into one’s breath, or can refer to the inner being of the person. When we pause we create the space to drop into and nourish our inner being.
This is increasingly needed in a society where an emphasis on work, productivity and speed has thrown it completely off balance. It focuses on purpose and mistakes that for meaning. Pausing allows us touch the sources of meaning in our lives. Letting busyness go and entering into a space kept empty nourishes us. It is not wasted unproductive time. On the contrary, doing nothing may be the most important work we can do.
Mindfulbalance 