Mindfulness meditation doesn’t change life: lIfe remains as fragile and unpredictable as ever: Meditation changes the heart’s capacity to accept life as it is. It teaches the heart to be more accommodating, not by beating it into submission, but by making it clear that accommodating is a gratifying choice. accommodation of the heart is not always easy. Knowing that it is a possibility is a great inspiration. Having an accommodating heart is the ultimate freedom. Practicing accommodation on the small, moment-to-moment disappointments of life – not forgetting our preferences but remaining spacious and relaxed when they are not met – prepares us to deal with the larger challenges of life.
Sylvia Boorstein, Don’t just do something, sit there
Meditation is a process of lightening up, of trusting the basic goodness of what we have and who we are, and of realizing that any wisdom that exists, exists in what we already have. Being satisfied with what we already have is a magical golden key to being alive in a full, unrestricted and inspired way. One of the major obstacles to what has been traditionally called enlightenment is resentment, feeling cheated, holding a grudge against who you are, where you are, what you are. This si why we talk so much about maki ng friends with ourselves because for one reason or another we don’t feel that satisfaction in a full and complete way. 
Mindfulness means attention. It means that when you are washing your face in the morning, you actually feel the slippery soap and the warm water splashing in your hands. All too often, direct experience of the real-time present is replaced, forgotten, hastily bypassed. In our rush to get to the next moment, we substitute a fantasy life, an imagined life in the future for the actual life we are living. I’ve washed my face thousands of times, and I’m bored with it, so instead I am already caught up in planning and rehearsing what I need to say later in the morning at the 9.30 meeting. Which is more real – my presence at the sink or my ideas about this mornings agenda? Mindfulness lets us reclaim the lives we are actually living. 
We tend to personalize everything. Why everything gets at us and makes us so angry is because of something our mind is doing – but to acknowledge that entails giving up some position of “me” and “my emotions” that are right and justified. Now, I’m not saying that abandonment means not feeling anything – that attitude really drives people into dangerously repressed places. The way is about seeing how things get under our skin ad chafe our heart. It’s about abandoning the action of taking in dukkha. We widen our perspective into being aware of how we are feeling and with that clear and steady awareness, we can watch the mental process very carefully. 
Mindful breathing brings your body and mind back together. In our busy society it’s a great fortune to be able to sit and breathe consciously from time to time. Paying attention to your breathing is a way for your body to relax. As you continue breathing with awareness, your breath naturally becomes slower and deeper. As you breathe, you can say to yourself: 
Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche talked about mindfulness meditation as a process of “touch and go.” “Touch” means really acknowledging, really appreciating, the texture of a particular mental content, not just bouncing off of it. It is the difference between a gentle squeeze and a superficial tap. This touching, acknowledging, appreciating, is the seed for developing insight — a way of being present to phenomena that invites fresh meanings to emerge. Because Westerners tend to be more split off from the experiential body than people in more traditional cultures, the practice of Focusing can facilitate our ability to touch genuinely what arises in the mind-heart in a non-discursive way. As Pema Chodron recently advised a questioner with doubts about her meditation practice, “There is a secret ingredient — direct, nonverbal experience.”
