Christmas is a time which amplifies our tendency to generate a lot of stories about ourselves and how our lives are going. We are surrounded by many images – happy families, perfect relationships, cheerful celebrations – and if our personal situation does not match them, we can be tempted to feel that something is wrong. The key to keeping the mind relaxed at times like this is to be aware of the feelings provoked, and see them as mental energies to be worked with. In this way we can observe them as stories and not take them as the truth about our life:
Our life is becoming more and more inundated with TV shows, movies, videos, magazines and newspaper articles that seem to show and tell us what life is like. And then the inevitable comparisons arise: “My life isn’t like that” or “I wish it were” or “It is exactly like that”. The moment we notice sad and painful feelings arising, from thoughts like “I’m unloved; I feel separate and isolated” can we immediately stop, look and listen instead of going on weaving fancy narratives about ourselves? Can we stop and ask, “Where is this feeling coming from? ” Right now. Asking right this moment. Becoming more transparent to the thoughts and images that evoke these feelings and then deepen, embellish and propagate them. Becoming aware, let us taste directly how stories run our lives.
Toni Parker, The Silent Question.
