To be mindful means that we notice the sound or the smell come into consciousness, and then, instead of pushing the sense impression away or holding on to it, we’re aware of how the mind reacts. We stay centred and notice that the impression and the feeling that arises comes, and then goes. We can actually watch and feel the mind’s inclination to lunge out towards something that’s pleasant, whereas before it would simply lunge out, grasp and then proliferate about it. With mindfulness we can notice the movement of the mind arise and then, when we don’t engage with it, we see it falling away, ceasing. We see that it comes and goes in a wave pattern, and we begin to experience a steadiness underneath the waves. So in this respect mindfulness has two qualities. Firstly, it is dispassionate; it has no particular ambition, it’s neither rejecting or ashamed of anything, nor is it fascinated by anything. Secondly, it notices that things arise and cease.
Ajahn Sucitto, Mindfulness and Clear Comprehension
Eventually, we all need to be willing to face the deepest, darkest beliefs we have about ourselves. Only in this way can we come to know that they are only beliefs, and not the truth about who we are. By entering into this process willingly, by seeing through the fiction of who we believe ourselves to be, we can connect with our true nature. As Nietzsche put it, ‘One must have chaos in oneself to give birth to a dancing star.’ Love is the dancing star, the fruit of saying yes, of consciously and willingly facing our fears.
Silence is a very perilous part of life. It tells us what we are obsessing about. It reminds us of what we have not resolved within ourselves. It shows to us the underside of ourselves, from which there is no escape, which no amount of cosmetics can hide, that no amount of money or titles or power can possibly cure. Silence leaves us with only ourselves for company.
