Mindfulness is the aware, balanced acceptance of the present experience.
It isn’t more complicated than that.
It is opening to or receiving the present moment, pleasant or unpleasant, just as it is, without either clinging to it or rejecting it.
Sylvia Boorstein
I was driving home from lecturing today and saw a hawk, still in the sky, hovering over the field, its eyes fixed on prey somewhere far below. I do not know why but this sight always makes me catch my breath; I always feel that I am before a thing of beauty. And it brought home to me again how animals simply are true to their nature, and follow their essence, without worrying too much about the meaning of it. They are, in some ways, “simple” – in the sense that the medieval writers used to talk about God – in the unity of their being and their actions. They are not divided within.
We, on the other hand, are frequently only too aware of the divisions within ourselves , of ongoing tensions, of a separation from our deepest self. We may spend our lives seeking a greater unity and a simple, undivided self, but on a day-to-day level are most conscious of how much we observe ourselves from outside. We are rarely just one., with ourselves or with our experiences. As I listened to the class today sharing their stories, I realized yet again how difficult it is to achieve the wholeness and simplicity we desire. Everyone forms ways of behaving – or defenses – as they are growing up, to cope with the demands and dangers of experiences that threatened them emotionally – caused maybe by parents’ imperfections or ways that they felt left down. And thus some arrive in adulthood with structures which allow them keep going in safety, but which at the same time can keep them severely limited in their fears and lack of ability to trust. Or others arrive with huge conditions placed on their worth – tied to others’ approval or to the necessity to strive, to achieve success or push themselves in work. They look outside themselves for the solutions to the emotional templates formed within when young.
We find it so hard to simply be ourselves, to believe that this is enough, that it is a safe place to be. We look to always add something to ourselves, or to this moment, to feel secure. And yet, looking at the hawk today, in its stillness, what strikes me most is the absence of something, maybe the absence of striving, the resting in just what it is – the ability to just be still and secure with that. We too need to relax into our own being, to let go of the patterns we have built up to protect ourselves, to trust that who we are, deep down, is enough.
We all have well-established habits of thought, emotion, reaction and judgement, and without the keen awareness of practice, we’re just acting out these patterns. When they arise, we’re not aware they’ve arisen. We get lost in them, identify with them, act on them — so much of our life is just acting out patterns.
Joseph Goldstein
When your mind is reeling in confusion, breathe deeply into the centre of your chest.
Connecting to the core of your being this way extends loving kindness to yourself , even when there is none in sight.
Ezra Bayda
In meditation we first become familiar with a technique: to recognize and release thoughts and emotions and return our attention to the breath. As we learn to abide peacefully, we also become familiar with what I call a healthy sense of self. We become strong, caring, clear-minded individuals in harmony with ourselves and our environment. The meditation posture itself embodies this healthiness: grounded, balanced and relaxed.
Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche
I came across a definition of meditation that it comes from the root meaning ‘right balance.’ That rang true for me because, personally, my attention is often so fragmented, egocentric, narcissistic or self-concerned that there isn’t a whole lot of inner balance or alignment with what is. Rather, I am stuck in a state of nonbalance. Right balance is when my mind is not spinning out endless movies and delusions, or maybe it still is but I am just not so attached to believing them. Meditation is when I can watch stuff go by and the part of me that usually interrupts and says, ‘That’s a good story, or that son of a bitch, or I’m guilty and awful,’ that part sits back and sees it as just one more story but without attachment to it.
Joan Borysenko, quoted in Oprah Magazine
On an evening when an Irish golfer needs to stay focused, some thoughts on a key early practice in meditation. Being mindful means we work on our capacity to simply watch our thoughts and emotions, allowing them pass through a stable field of awareness without disturbing it excessively. To do this we need to strengthen our capacity to let go of distractions and the running after happiness by creating a calmness and constancy in the mind that observes good and bad with an equal ability to accept things as they are. This capacity to focus – to be one-pointed in our attention – is at the heart of our freedom from anxiety:
Concentration is the cornerstone of mindfulness practice. Your mindfulness will only be as robust as the capacity of your mind to be calm and stable. You can think of concentration as the capacity of the mind to sustain an unwavering attention on one object of observation.…….. A calmness develops with concentration practice that has a remarkable stable quality to it. It is steadfast, profound, hard to disturb, no matter what comes up. You can look deeply into something if you sustain your looking without being constantly thrown off by distractions or the agitation of your own mind.
Jon Kabat Zinn, Wherever you go, there you are.
