I am in love with the Ocean, lifting her thousands of white hats in the chop of the storm, or lying smooth and blue, the loveliest bed in the world.
In the personal life, there is always grief more than enough, a heart-load for each of us on the dusty road.
I suppose there is a reason for this, so I will be patient, acquiescent.
But I will live nowhere except here, by Ocean, trusting equally in all the blast and welcome of her sorrowless, salt self.
Mary Oliver, Red Bird
Our lives are not just on the surface; their greater part is concealed from casual observation. If we would like our obscure fears come into the open and dissolve, the conscious mind must be somewhat still, not everlastingly occupied; then, as the fears come to the surface, they must be observed without let or hindrance, for any form of condemnation or justification only strengthens fear. To be free from all fear, we must be awake to its darkening influence,a and only constant watchfulness can reveal its many causes.
Krishnamurti, Education and the Significance of Life
I often suggest that my students ask themselves the simple question: Do I know how to live? Do I know how to eat? How much to sleep? How to take care of my body? How to relate to other people?….Life is the real teacher and the curriculum is all set up. The question is: Are there any students?
Larry Rosenberg, Breath by Breath
This moment, this situation that faces us right now – this patient, this person, this family, this illness, this task, this pain or beauty – we have never seen it before. What is it? How do we respond? I don’t know. Not knowing, I am ready to be surprised, ready to listen and understand, ready to respond as needed, ready to let others respond, ready to do nothing at all, if that is what is called for. I can be informed by my past experience but it is much better if I am ready and able to let that go, and just be present, just listen, just not know. Experience, knowledge, wisdom – these are good, but when I examine things closely I can see that they remove me from what’s in front of me. When I know, I bring myself forward, imposing myself and my experience on this moment. When I don’t know, I let experience come forward and reveal itself. When I can let go of my experience, knowledge, and wisdom I can be humble in the face of what is, and when I am humble I am ready to be truly fearless and intimate. I can enter into this moment, which is always a new relationship, always fresh. I can be moved by what happens, fully engaged and open to what the situation will show me.
Norman Fischer, Not knowing is most intimate
Each time you stay present with fear and uncertainty, you’re letting go of an habitual way of finding security and comfort. All those brain studies about meditation — where they place people in MRI machines or put electrodes on their heads — show us that each time you dare to remain where you are and do something completely fresh, unconventional, and nonhabitual, you open up new pathways in the brain. You experience that as strength and it builds your capacity to be open the next time around. By contrast, each time you follow your habitual approach, you reinforce the old pathway and make it more likely that you’ll go that way once again next time around.
We get many reruns in life, big reruns and small reruns. If your heart is gripped by jealousy or rage or loneliness or any other manifestation of fear, you don’t have to learn from it all at once. It’s not like if you get it right once, if you overcome your jealousy or anger once, then it’s smooth sailing with that emotional pattern for the rest of your life. There will be reruns. It will keep coming back, following the old grooves in the brain. That means you have lots and lots of chances to rouse yourself and let go. No need to exaggerate an emotional pattern, fixate on it, fuel it with more thoughts, or go into a tailspin. When you feel the shakiness, when the thoughts start to arise, when the tailspin is beginning, another rerun is in progress. You simply rouse yourself and let yourself be there.
Pema Chodron.
Epictetus say that everything has two handles, one by which it can be borne and one which it cannot.
If your brother sins against you, he says, don’t take hold of it by the wrong he did you but by the fact that he’s your brother.
That’s how it can be borne.
Anne Tyler
