Most of us have learned to live, or have been encouraged to live, in a manner where we get love.
We want to be loved, and we think that being loved is the highest point.
But actually, loving is the highest point.
Stephen Levine
When we notice that the conditions of the mind and the body are just the way conditions are, it’s a simple recognition. It’s not an analysis and it is not anything special. It’s just a bare recognition, a direct knowing of whatever passes away. Knowing in this way demands a certain amount of patience; otherwise as soon as any fear, anger or unpleasantness arises, we will run away from it. So meditation is also the ability to endure, and bear with, the unpleasant. We don’t seek it out; we are not ascetics, looking for painful things to endure so that we can prove ourselves. We are simply recognizing the way it is right now. Meditation is established on that which is ordinary, not on that which is extraordinary.
Ajahn Sumedho, The Mind and the Way.
If you remember nothing else, always remember this: we don’t have to feel any particular way. We don’t have to have special experiences, nor do we have to be any particular way. With whatever arises, whether it’s pleasing or not, try to remember that all we can do is experience and work with whatever our life is right now. No matter what life is and no matter how we feel about it, all that matters in practice is whether we can honestly acknowledge what is going on, and then stay present with the physical experience of that moment.
Ezra Bayda.